Author: Nicolas Ventosa

A sign of the times: the invisible effects of not being aware of your own emotions

[About the author: Nicolás Ventosa is a psychologist working on health inequalities. He was a student on the City, University of London Writing for Business short course in Oct-Dec 2018, and wrote this blog as part of a homework/in-class exercise on that course.]

There were certain moments in my life that left me wanting to understand “what happened?”. Most of them related to someone ending a relationship with me suddenly and without explanation, or not being able to talk about their feelings. Some others involved people fencing poor arguments in favour of hate speeches, even against themselves.

These moments have occurred throughout my life in different ways, but they left me great insight. The more I worked on my own issues, the more I understood. These people were not aware how their personal experiences were affecting their decisions. I was not aware of how my past experiences created the lens I was using to see the world.

And these people… they are normal people. Buying at your supermarket, working with you, and even going to the same gym. They could be a family member or a friend. In fact, you might be one yourself. People who lack emotional intelligence are everywhere and you might feel like stumbling with the same stone once you become more conscious of your own story.

Starting to understand what the word “emotion” means is a good way to spark the discussion. Pressing fast-forward, the word emotion could be broken into two important parts: “e”, for energy, and “motion”, for movement. So, emotions are energy in motion. They move around our body and impulse us to act. Emotions seek release. The problem is, when they are badly managed, emotions will cause us a lot of problems.